Sunday, October 10, 2004

Surprise Surprise

We know it's coming; that single event so dramatic it could influence the election's outcome. We're 10 days into October. Iraq is still FUBAR. Bush, after going nutzoid on national teevee -- twice! -- is losing ground in the polls. As the Festival of the Dead draws near, Unka Karl is stiring the cauldron.

"We've got a couple of surprises that we intend to spring," Rove told ABC radio host Sean Hannity while explaining that he intends to wage an aggressive campaign no matter what the polls show.

Over at October Surprise!, they're polling possibilities:

    • WMD's found in Iraq!
    • Osama bin Laden captured!
    • Spectacular terrorist attack on US soil!
    • Vote is threatened by terrorist attacks, vote suspended due to red alert.
    • US pulls out of Iraq in October, leaving the UN in charge.
    • Diebold Election Systems fixes the vote in battleground states.
    • Escalation in Israel, Iran, or North Korea. US opens a new war front.

Lessee.... WMDs? No way.

Osama captured? Not even the Master Rovejician can pull that rabbit out of the hat.

Terrorist attack here in the states? Uh uh.

Voting threatened or suspended for red alert? Never. The last thing Chimpy McFlightsuit wants is half the US population, armed with torches and pitchforks, descending on the WH like angry villagers out of a Frankenstein movie and demanding his removal.

Cheating voting machines? See above.

World war three breaks out over there within the next three weeks? No.

YT thinks Rove has monkeys flyin' out his ass. Surprise! I'm with John Kerry when he sez we're in for "more of the same" from Team Bush. More slander. More mud slinging. More lies. More spin. More media whoring, which has already begun:

The conservative-leaning Sinclair Broadcast Group, whose television outlets reach nearly a quarter of the nation's homes with TV, is ordering its stations to preempt regular programming just days before the Nov. 2 election to air a film that attacks Sen. John F. Kerry's activism against the Vietnam War, network and station executives familiar with the plan said Friday.

Let them have their swiftliars and axe grinders, we've got an October Surprise of our own. Yesiree. We've got the Big Dog. According to Daily Dish (archived story dated 10/3/04 titled BILL, ON MEND, HELPS DEM PAL) Bill's doing great, he's working the phones, and is expected to stump for Kerry mid-month. Yay!


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